Sunday, October 4, 2009

My church recently put out another study guide that follows the Sunday morning sermons. In the back are "125 Bible Questions for Kids." I thought they were amusing, horrifying and, generally, hilarious. Here are some examples:

Q. "Who wrote the Bible?"
A. "God told His people what to write down."

Q. "Does the Bible have any mistakes?"
A. "No, it is perfect."

Q. "Will animals be in heaven?"
A. "Yes."

Q. "Will heaven be scary?"
A. "No, everything is fun an it never even gets dark."

Q. "What are some sins you have done?"
A. "Yelling, not sharing, stealing, yelling, lying, etc."
(Yes, yelling was listed twice.)

Q. "Name some things a Christian husband is supposed to do."
A. "Love God, love his wife, work hard, make money, etc."

Q. "What will Jesus be like when he comes back to stop the bad guys?"
A. "He will ride a horse, wear a white robe dipped in blood, and have a sword coming from his mouth."

Q. "Who should tell a girl who she should marry?"
A. "Her daddy."

These are all copied word-for-word from the book. Seriously.

Friday, June 12, 2009

The First Post

I really hope this blog doesn't become simply a place for me to vent and complain. The most I can hope for are interesting posts that most people can relate to, at least most people who share a common disdain for fakeness and fanaticism. I plan to only post when I truly feel moved and only when I have something valuable or noteworthy to say. Most blogs that I've read don't adhere to this policy. On the other hand, some bloggers inhabit the other side of the spectrum. These bold souls see nothing grey; they are the same people who condemn in the blink of an eye yet without much introspection.

This is as good time as any to apologize.

I am sorry that, while I liberally utilize 'big' words, I don't seem to fully grasp the rules of English punctuation and grammar. Please do not confuse my writing style with pomp and show. It is simply the result of too much reading and not enough organization or thought in what I write.

I hope you derive a benefit from what I write.

Until I write again,

W.M. Haustelyn